Khan and Green brothers to join Aragon department heads

 

Internet sensations Sal Khan and brothers of Crash Course Hank and John Green will be joining the Aragon faculty in the 2021-2022 school year. Khan will serve as head of the math department, Hank Green as science department and John Green as both English and history departments. 

“I’m pretty indifferent about the new department heads,” said Jack Pott. “It won’t really be that much of a change as they’ve pretty much been my teachers the entire semester. I’m just excited to ask Sal Khan to give me some more energy points so that I can earn the next avatar.”

Throughout distance learning, many students have become reliant on YouTube videos and education websites in order to learn and study.

“If it wasn’t for John Green’s videos, I would have had to rely on my knowledge of the hit musical ‘Hamilton’ to pass my American Revolution test,” said junior Jorge Washington. “The only reason I passed my final is because I rewatched his entire U.S. history playlist on YouTube.”

Instructional videos aren’t only used for supplemental learning but also watched during class time.

“Hank Green basically taught me all of chemistry,” said sophomore Maria Curie. “My teacher just played his videos all year: all 46 of them. I don’t even know what my teacher sounds like because they never talk.”

For some students, watching videos rather than listening to their teachers lecture for hours helps them learn.

“I kept telling my teachers that I was a visual learner and that they needed to adjust the curriculum to match my strengths,” said Funny Name. “It’s about time! Hopefully they will also accept that I am test-phobic and start to accommodate that too.”

Under and upperclassmen alike who are studying for the ACT or SAT are especially grateful that Khan will be a part of Aragon.

“My senior friends said that Sal Khan helped them ace their SATs,” said sophomore Aloe Ha. “I can’t wait until I can go to Mr. Khan’s Flex or office hours because it’s all really confusing right now. I think he knows everything.”

Students aren’t only excited to get to work with these teachers in person, but also to get the chance to get a behind the scenes look at video production.

“All I want in life is to be in one of Hank Green’s TikToks,” said junior Lucas Shywalker. “I’ve been threatening to eat toxic household items for months in his comments section hoping he would explain to me why scarfing down toilet cleaner would kill me, but he hasn’t noticed me yet. Now he won’t be able to ignore me. I don’t even care if I end up passing AP Biology next year as long as I can make a TikTok with the legend himself.”

Teachers are also excited to be collaborating with these famed educators.

“I honestly watch Sal Khan’s videos before every lesson I give just to make sure I know what I’m doing and can answer some of my students’ questions,” said geometry teacher Ida Goofoff. “If I don’t understand the topic or just don’t want to teach that day though, I’ll just put on one of his videos and it works like a charm. Now, I can just email him in the middle of class if I’m stuck on something. It’s amazing how YouTube videos at your fingertips have completely replaced me rolling in an ancient television and pulling out a Bill Nye VHS for my students.”

The language, physical education and visual and performing arts departments struggled to find new department heads, and suggestions from students are still welcome.

“The language department was thinking of reaching out to Duo the owl from Duolingo, but we had concerns that it would hold students’ families hostage until they were able to order soup at a restaurant in fluent Italian,” said French teacher Dinah Mite. 

While students return to in-person school, Khan and the Green brothers will be preparing for the new year.